Wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round........

Ok, getting from Hanoi all the way down to Saigon and getting to see the whole coastline for 50$ sounds like a bargain anytime....it's only when you sit, or lie down if you wish, on the bus that you realise what you actually bought for the 50 bucks!
These are mostly overnight sleeper buses, taking some 15h between destinations, the beds or more reclining seats are made for asian man. Ahh now the problems start to arise slowly...Even for petite moi (171cm) it is cramped, I'd need to chop off my feet to lay full length. Now consider....umm..oh I don't know...say for instance my partner in crime Nick who is more 180cm trying to squeeze down on those seats! Doesn't sound bad enough yet for a 15h ride.....oh that's cause I forgot to mention the bumpy ride that is free of charge on the bus ride!!

See Vietnam don't do western roads ala smooth pavement, instead you get country side roads full of cars and bikes the driver constantly needs to avoid and the occasional dissapearing  road in front of you (Fuck ouch!!), that's when you hit your head in the ceiling 2 am in the morning having tried to sleep for the past 3 h!! The bus drivers got a schedule so he doesn't mind much slowing in either, hell no take that bump in the road like a man!!!!
But wait....there's more! See you have bottom and bunk bed.....top can be fun, swaying up high looking through the window....that is if you have the time while trying desperately not to slide of the bed and land on the poor unsuspecting tourist beneath you!

Ok could be worse? Hey when in Vietnam...yes it could!!! See it is pretty smart to store up on liquid (means water and not what your thinking) before stepping on the bus, as well as remembering to drink it so you don't get dehydrated! Only problem is 3 am in the morning with 8h to go on the trip when you need to go to the WC....and it's broken!!!!! SOS, mayday....ehh help!! Ahh now you start panicking! Forget kamikaze hookers this is real pain!!!

One of our beloved buses!

Yes dear readers, when going on bus ride through thrid world country, consider these thoughts carefully!
On the good side I can mention that the buses are clean and the people they carry of mostly cheery and talky!!

Petrov and Crockett

Nha Trang, apparently a charter resort. It was confirmed to us when we arrived from the bus and entered the city. All the big hotels designed in the 80s everything was in three languages (vietnamese, English and russian) and a big beach. It felt like we entered a russian version of Miami Vice. We found a nice hotel (8 bucks a pop) and went exploring this new era... Not that much to see really. The waves were so huge they were scary, the city screamed "charter" everywhere we went. We found one place with a friendly waittress, and had alligator. I also needed my drug (massage) but all we found were the ones which we have been warned about (not good). So no dice. We decided also that nothing much was to see here so we booked to mui ne the next day. We are going to learn ourselves Kitesurfing! Awesome. Lets see what happens.

Pappa has found himself a new drug!

Ok, so imagine this: a small quaint fishing village, a river dividing the town and small boats here and there. Small streets with little vendors selling their merchandise by day, by night a place with life, music and romance just gushing. Fresh seafood and fruit shakes with only fresh products abound the restaurants and all for the low price of 15kr. Then when your done you take your little scooter and a 15 minute drive to the clear sandy beach for a nice little evening stroll. Then if your not tired then you can take a soothing body massage for 60kr.

That's Ha noi in a nutshell. A perfect getaway for a romantic couple who just want to enjoy the scenery and life. Everyone is friendly and not one frown can be found. It's amazing this place. To bad I'm a backpacker and must travel because I think I found my town. Oh well, I will go on and try my hand at the next place. Nha Trang, Apparently also a beach area with diving and pleasantries. Lets hope for the best!

Kamikaze hookers!!!!!!

Ok we ain't got a clue what the hell to expect once we get to beach paradise Nha Thrang but apparently you gotta watch out night time for beach cruising Kamikaze Hookers....??!! If they see you, I guess they put they're heat scensors on and make a quick dive on you and then you go SPLAT hehe! Yes people one of the big problems you need to look out for as a tourist if you go to Vietnam is the Kamikazes Hookers

KAMIKAAAAZZEEEEEEEE! SPLAT!

!

Picture time!!!!

Picture time äntligen mina små vänner!! Hårt pressade och efterlängtade bilder kommer äntligen nu från första veckorna i Kina och den första veckan i Vietnam!

Forbidden city in the morning

Awesome architecture

Quick Nick in Forbidden City

Uncle Mao's glory

Nick's Zoolander pose

Donkey intestins and tongue at local donkey restaurant

Chinese hot pot!!! The hot in pot comes the day after =)

Amazing courtyards at the Lama temple

Our funny roommate David entertained us everyday, here with a panda hat

Everything is big in China, Tinamen square, roughly 30 footbaall fields in size

Xi'an and the terracotta, approx 7000 pieces

Scenery from train in China was at times amazing, mountain village

People's park, Chengdu

The cutest, fattest, laziest animal ever!!!

HomoNickSapiens, extremely endangeroud species. DO NOT FEED!

Tired to the bone at Lao Cai border China-Vietnam

Dude's on the ship taking us to Ha long bay

James Bond island from "The man with the golden gun" in sunset at Ha long bay

Ha Long bay...fucking awesome as the dude in the pic

Ha Long Bay, I rest my case....

View of Cat Ba island after trekkin up the mountains

Cat Ba is so untouched and beautiful

A little village we found on our motorbikes in the middle of nowhere!

Like I mentioned, it takes your breath away at times.

Ok se No.5....They eat dogs and cats...so they could have evolved to infants hehe

Toilet Culture of China

Today we will look into something different than my normal posts. The "toilet culture" of China is quite interesting. Most places we have been to have maybe one western toilet (as in a seat). all other stalls have only a porcelain hole in the ground. Great fun is to be had if you need to go and all you find is a squater. Plus it seems that no toilets ever have toilet paper. which means you have to bring your own. What fun!

This of course leads to many questions. Does everyone in china bring toilet paper with them at all time? If not, what do they do when they need to go? Do they wipe their butts after they go publicly? Is the person next to me have crusty crap in their bum? Do they wipe them selves at all? Does that mean when it's warm and everyone is sweating, does the whole city smell like crap?

As you can see, many questions arise once you start thinking about it. Then comes the worse thought of them all (thanks James for making me realise it). Everyone you meet in China you think is hot, most likely squats, has crap in their bums (mostly bad news for James HAHA) and if we get up in a good sweat it's going to smell! Yay for poopy pants!

Luckily most people flush (but not everyone). My worst experience was in konming at their bus station:

Many stalls (good), none of the doors lock (bad), It smells a bit and none of the stalls are clean (worse), Finally brave it and take a dump in the last stall (good), next door stall flushes and shit water starts flooding into my stall (FUCKITY FUCK FUCK, MAYDAY MAYDAY, GET THE FUCK OUT!). Only thought then was just to get the fuck out and not touch the oncoming shit flood that has appeared. Luckily the shit flood went into my hole so the whole ground wasn't covered and I could escape unscathed. So yeah, toilets in china are an experience in themselves.

Later everyone!

Heres a frenchy, theres a Frenchy, everywhere a Frenchy

Well last time on our big voyage, we traveled from konming to hekou. What a trip! It was a 7 hour bus ride through the big mountains and the view was fantastic. To keep us entertained our bus driver would start some hiliri-bad movies for us to watch. Then we took a stop for lunch and was served a bowl of noodles with chicken. I was the lucky one and got the chicken head in my bowl. Awesome! Didn't know how to eat it so I just left it in the bowl.

In Hekou we walked to the border and made our way into Loa Cai (border town of Vietnam). We were there for a short time and took a train direct to Hanoi.

Hanoi is busy. Not as big as the Chinese cities which we've been in but a lot of motorcycles everywhere. When we arrived we had no0 idea where to go. The only info on the city was a pamphlet for the drift. A hostel in the middle of Hanoi. Problem we had no idea where it was or where we were. Eventually we found it and checked in. And I think I found a like-minded receptionist. Her job was to make sure we had a horrible time (in a good way, think me). After settling down we looked up different ways to get to Ha long bay. We ended up deciding to take a three day tour. Reason being we have been thinking too much these past few days and with this tour you don't have to think much.

Ha Long / Cat ba islands was amazing. The views were outstanding, unfortunatly not so much night life. But it was all good. We stayed extended our stay and had one day just motorcycling through the island and finally hitting the beaches. Apparently though we found out that Vietnam is where all the French spend their vacation. Everywhere we went it was just tons of french people. I got to practice my french and impress everyone with my knowledge of the french culture (Joe Dassin). I don't think anyone was impressed but they laughed (at me or with me I don't know which) at least.

Now we arrived back at Hanoi and tommorrow head to Hue/Hoi An. Apparently good beaches and some surfing. We can only hope!

Vietnamese of the day:
Come on (phonetically) = Thank you
boom boom = massage
kong = no

Beijing / Xian Photos

Here are some pictures of Beijing and Xi'an more will follow. I do apologize to you photography buffs. I'm still learning my camera so the later ones hopefully become better.

our hostel in beijing

Some yummy local food

Our first meal. A yummy noodle soup.

Forbidden city

entrance to the city

One of the lions inside the city, Apparently female (playing with a cub, male play with a ball)

One of the many hutong (alley) districts

a kitchen in the hutong. Its as small as it looks

Left to right: Frankie, David, my compatriot James and Milan

the busy market in confucios temple

llama temple (much praying there)

Xians local dish, dumpling soup

some family who randomly walked up to us to take photos of us. Thought I'd do the same of them.

Lake in Xian which had many temples

The moat sorrounding Xi'an

Panda (the receptionists puppy)

A stone statue at the terracotta army